One Night In Heaven
by B0gw0ppit
Summary: It's Hodges' Birthday, and he's about to get a present he won't forget in a hurry! Hodges/? A harmless bit of smut for those who think Hodges should get more!


Title: One Night In Heaven

Author: B0gw0ppit

Rating: M

Disclaimer: I own nothing except my dreams, my VW Camper and my dog

Summary: Hodges finally gets a bit of lovin' when one of his fantasies (Yes, he _does_ fantasize about this, even if he would never admit it) comes true.

Author's Note: Ok, this came to me in one of those flashes of inspiration when an idea pops into your head and all of a sudden you are laughing hysterically and the neighbors wonder what you're doing in there... You _do_ have those moments don't you? I'm not the only one...? Anyway, it won't leave me alone and so I'm going to have to write it down. And I thought it was about time I wrote something a bit less angst-ridden about the poor guy!

Warning: Fairly explicit sex scene, but mostly done in fun so nothing offensive I hope.

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_T'was one night in Vegas_

_And all through the lab_

_Not a creature was stirring _

_Not even one of Grissom's bugs_

_The evidence lay under the microscope with care_

_In the hope that once again David Hodges would find the case breaker and at last he would be recognized for the genius that he truly was_...

Hodges liked it like this - all the CSIs were out in the field where they couldn't pester him for results, most of the other lab techs were at home in bed where all normal people should be (as far as he knew only Bobby was in work, and he was down in the bowels of the crime lab with his precious guns. Jaqui may have been around somewhere, but he hadn't seen her) and he was alone in his own little domain, free to put his creative, _brilliant _mind to good use solving unsolvable cases, finding unfindable evidence, and generally making the world a safer place to live.

He put the plate under the scope and sat down, scooting his chair across the room to pluck some earlier results from the copier, then scooting back again, all the while humming to himself. Glancing up at the clock he sighed, pouting slightly. Two minutes past midnight - two minutes into his fortieth year on Earth. Nobody had remembered it was his birthday; there was no surprise party for him when he came in earlier, like they had done for Bobby last month, and Archie before that... and Wendy, Mandy, Jacqui... In fact, everybody else... But he didn't care. He was above such things, far too important and sophisticated to bother with such things as party poppers and cake... He had hoped that maybe Grissom would have remembered, seeing as the two of them worked so closely, were partners almost, Grissom relying on his valuable knowledge so much to break cases wide open... you would have thought he might wish him Many Happy Returns... Ah well, everyone knew geniuses... Genii?... had far more important things to think about than birthdays.

He frowned down into the lens of the 'scope, then lifted his head thoughtfully to write down his findings, but before he could move everything went black. A soft, warm hand was covering his eyes, and he froze.

"Don't move," hissed an undeniably feminine voice, and he squeaked in fright but complied.

Obviously this was one of those mad women, probably a suspect or the girlfriend of a suspect. Having heard what an amazing, unstoppable machine David Hodges was at solving cases she had come down here to murder him. Or at the very least take away the evidence that would put them away.

Then he felt the whisper of silk stroke softly across his cheek, and the hand was replaced by an even blacker darkness as his eyes were bound. Ok... that was... different... At least whoever it was wanted him to be comfortable while they were killing him.

"Give me your hands," whispered the voice close to his ear, and he whimpered again, holding his shaking hands up in front of him.

They were taken quite gently and brought around to the back of his chair behind him, where he felt the touch of cold of steel, and heard the unmistakable sound of handcuffs clicking closed. He swallowed roughly, and gritted his teeth to stop himself crying. One of his favourite fantasies was about to come true, being handcuffed and blindfolded by a beautiful woman... well, a woman anyway, and it was only happening because he was going to be murdered, tortured and murdered. How did he ever come to have such shitty luck?

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**_4 hours earlier, and five women sitting in the break room:_**

"It's Hodges' fortieth tomorrow. We should do something."

"Yeah but what?"

A giggle.

"Not a party, he'd hate that. He doesn't like surprises."

"Or hot dogs."

"No."

"What then?"

"A blow-up Wendy?!"

Gasp. More giggles.

"Be serious."

"I was."

"I know what he'd like..."

Four pairs of eyes turn to the speaker.

"What?"

"The other day, in the locker room, he was talking in his sleep..."

_Two minutes later:_

"Oh my God! But who's gonna do it?"

"Not _me_!"

"Well don't look at_me_!"

"No _way_!"

"... I'll do it."

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Hodges' life was flashing before him as he held his breath in anticipation of the final blow, but to his surprise all he felt were soft, gentle hands on his shoulders, warm through his shirt, firmly kneading all the tension out of his tired muscles. He couldn't help but groan in pleasure. But who the heck _was_ this woman?

"Who _is_ that?" he asked.

"Sshh..." came the whispered, husky reply. "Don't question, just enjoy. You're about to get the best birthday present you've ever had."

David leaned back into the wonders those hands were working on his tense shoulders, and did as he was told. Who was he to argue when it felt so good?

It was odd, being able to feel, but not to see or to move. When he experimentally wiggled his wrists it was to realize that they had been handcuffed securely around the back of his chair, so that unless he was a contortionist (and David Hodges may be many things, but contortionist was not one of them) there was no way he was going to get himself loose. The hands slowly began to move further over his shoulders and down the front of his shirt, and he felt buttons pop undone one by one. A familiar twitching could be felt in his pants and he winced, hoping the effect those hands were having wasn't too evident. He wriggled slightly in his seat, but before he could do any more to alleviate his embarrassment he felt warm a mouth pressing against his, a small tongue flickering against his lips, making him gasp aloud. The tongue slipped inside to find his, and he groaned. So far she hadn't been lying, this was pretty much the best present yet...

But she hadn't finished, far from it. Lips still on his, tongue still exploring his mouth as he tilted his head to the side to meet her, the mystery woman moved slowly around to kneel in front of him, breaking the contact only as she pushed his chair back to slide between it and his desk. Warm hands spread across his smooth bare chest, soon to be followed by those expert lips as she began to kiss her way down across his naked flesh. Hodges whimpered as the hands reached his zipper and began to slowly unbuckle his belt.

_Oh God..._

He began to recite formulas in his head to keep from making a complete idiot of himself like a teenager, biting hard down on his bottom lip as the prize those talented hands sought was found. Not that he ever _had_ made an idiot of himself as a teenager of course... he had _far_ too much self control... Was this really happening? Or was he asleep again? Like that time in the break room when he had been thinking about Wendy and woke up to find himself drooling all over the table.

He gasped aloud as the hot sweet mouth that had so recently abandoned his lips now put itself to good use on another area of his anatomy, and those formulas he was reciting were suddenly completely forgotten. In fact, everything Hodges had ever learned went straight out of his head and all of his muscles - well, all except one - turned to jello. Forget seventh heaven - Hodges was in eight, ninth, tenth, _twelfth_ heaven!

Twenty seconds later the mystery woman arose, and Hodges slowly came back down to earth as she stepped lightly around to the back of his chair.

"I'm going to put the key in your hand," she spoke softly, warm breath on his ear, and this time instead of a whimper of fear it was a shiver of pleasure that ran through him. "It will take you a few seconds to get out of those cuffs, and by the time you do I'll be gone. Don't try to follow me."

Hodges mumbled incoherently, and the next minute felt a small metal object sliding into his palm. He fumbled with it, normally dexterous fingers suddenly clumsy. He had to know who she was, he _needed_ to know! As soon as he managed to undo the cuffs he threw them on the floor and ripped the slip of black silk off his eyes, staring out of the window to the darkened corridor outside. He started toward the door, then stopped and looked down.

_Aw what_? She could at least have zipped him back up!

Job done, he ran outside, but the corridor was empty, as he knew it would be. He turned back to his lab dejectedly, realizing there was no point looking for her. She was long gone, and he would never know who had given him such a world-shattering birthday present.

Not unless he tried to get some saliva samples from...

_Nah_, he shook his head. if he did that he would have to take it to Wendy and... oh God it might have been her! How was he ever going to face her again? Fingerprints then... from his shirt... No, couldn't do that either, it might have been Mandy... or Jacqui... It could have been Sara, he was damn sure that uptight front she put on was just for show... Catherine? Nah... then again, she _was_divorced, and you know what they say about divorced women...

God dammit it could have been anyone! After all, they _all_ had the hots for him, he could tell these things, being a man of the world as he was. He sighed, and slumped back down in his chair, mentally going over the experience again, and again, and again... If it wasn't for the damp patch on his pants he would definitely not have believed it had happened. Wow, just wait til he told Bobby and Archie... Wait, he couldn't tell them! There was no way they would ever believe anyone would actually _do_ that, even to Hodges - Sex God Extraordinaire. Damn...

Six hours later and his case load was finally cleared, probably with a few mistakes caused by shaking hands and delayed shock, and Hodges was on his way home. Every few minutes throughout the night he had to stop to stare into space for a few seconds, before shaking his head incredulously and getting back to work. He tidied his desk, the way he always did, checked that his shirt was buttoned for the twentieth time, checked that his pants were zipped for the thirtieth time, and walked out of the lab.

"Hey Hodges, Happy Birthday," came a voice to his right, and he looked into fingerprinting to see Wendy sitting by her desk smiling seductively at him. "D'you have a good shift?"

Oh God, it _was_ her!

He froze, gulped, and nodded quickly, practically running down toward the locker room, where he almost knocked Mandy over as she came out the door on her way to start her shift.

"Hey Hodges, Happy Birthday. You look tired," she said brightly. "Hard night?"

Mandy? Was that a loaded question? Was it his imagination or did she have a twinkle in her eye as she asked?

As he walked out past reception he felt eyes on him, and turned to fix Judy with a worried frown.

"Bye David," she smiled sweetly, giving him a little wave. "Happy Birthday, I hope you enjoyed your present."

Fin


End file.
